Friday July 24th Late Night Talk Show Recap

Real time: Video to protect your home from black intellectuals. Ronald Reagan released a record where he talks against socialized medicine so Bill made ones where he talks against seatbelts, color TV making kids gay and clitoral stimulation. New rules: John McCain was Running with Empty (Palin). Don’t be surprised that Emma Watson is hot. No more creepy kid movies, they’re why Bill never had any kids. MJ’s fear of Joe Jackson wasn’t irrational. Not everyone in history were gay. Not everything in America has to make a profit especially health care. Bill goes on to talk about how health care shouldn’t need a profit and about the news sucking.

Conan: Max in Europe: getting beaten by police. Video of guy dressed as Dumbledore drunk and pissing off people. Conan and Andy go to an anime studio to do voices for an anime and they joke around with the lines a lot. Seth Rogen talks about dealing with cops when he was young, adjusting to fame, random other topics and Funny People. Rose Byrne talks about turning 30, a picture from her party with her dancing wild being put on facebook, and having a tiny role in Star Wars. Eric Hutchinson performs.

Letterman: Madoff countdown is back! Liberty with a muscular body in a bikini. Snow dogs pull a u-haul. Alaska’s new governor had held fire Merv Griffin rallies. A rat walks across the moon again. It’s finally here, men and their vegetables, and it sucked. In the middle of it a staff member gave Dave a note saying “someone in the audience vomited on the line in front of everyone” and Dave wonders why he needs to know and why now, pretty funny. Top 10 things overheard at Sarah Palin’s farewell party. Amy Poehler talks about her new baby and meeting Obama. Dave shows a picture of him with a giant radish then Joe Grossman comes in to say he’s sorry he vomited. Comic Nick Griffin does standup. Judy Collins performs.

Fallon: Jimmy writes thank you letters to people involved in current events. Jimmy and old supermodel Carol Alt do a fitness video using the huge health bill. Bob Saget talks about John Stamos, Don Rickles and shows a video where he runs down a bunch of people while talking on the cell phone. Anthony Mackie. Comic John Mulaney does standup and makes rape and crime funny, he was pretty good.

Ferguson: Rashida Jones talks with Craig a lot about gays and Europeans, her trip and Craig does the interview sitting next to her on the other sofa. Chef Jose Andres. Comic Jim Breur does standup.